The simple life
Updated: Nov 2
As I rest in my parents’ garden, listening to Roads*, I realize how happy I am right now. Life is easy. My brother just had his wedding. They are moving to the big world. My son just turned six. He misses two teeth** and he is amazing. I take a vacation at my parents’ house, looking forward to going back home to my amazing husband. Oh life. Thank you.
All I want is a simple life. I’ve seen complicated – not my thing. I want a small house with a yard. Near water. A forest near by would be perfect. A garden. This same computer. This same music. A cup of tea. My husband, my son, baby twins. Home made cookies. Oh heavens. I start fantasying.
* * *
Several days pass by, I am back home, back to the fast life in the city. Soon enough I have this anxious feeling like I need to do something. Something big. More. An echo of an old voice in my head, saying “it’s not enough”. A voice that sounds like me, saying I am not good enough. Saying that I should chase after everything everyone else seems to be chasing. Criticizing me. Making me feel bad.
Fortunately, somebody liked this photo that I put on social media the other day and reminded me of last week’s draft about my simple life. I read through. I should thank the Universe for the life I have every day. I should thank it for notifying me (with an actual notification) that I am letting my guard down, surrendering to negative thoughts. Letting anxiety in. Forgetting who I am. I’ll meditate instead. “Thank you for all the love in my life”.
I have everything that I cherish and I no longer chase after things other people want. I’m not saying it’s bad to want other things, it’s just not for me. Thoughts like that make me anxious, unstable. I want peaceful mornings and long showers. I love making new meals from leftovers. I want my coffee warm.
I don’t want more than I need. And everything I need, I have right here. Lots of love. Lots of people to love. A small place to call home, my fight with anxiety, my new beliefs and my old ones, my left eye bigger than the right, my new path in life.
Simple, long and peaceful life.
Life spent taking care of people, reading in the yard and looking at the stars. Life full of love.
I realize, I already have everything I want.
Thank you life ❤
**Well actually the new ones are out so technically he doesn’t miss anything